“If you want to find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration.” ~ Nikola Tesla
Nikola Tesla (not only are you my dream man) you took the words right out of my mouth.
Most people equate Tantra solely with sex, as if the two are synonyms. I wish to deepen the topic with this blog.
Tantra is not sex. Tantra is ……
Otherwise known as Resonance.
If you are reading this, my assumption is that you are hyper-intelligent and hyper clued-in.
You are not the type of person that when someone states, “Tantra is sex,” or “Tantra is slow sex,” or “Tantra is sensuality,” you buy it straight out without further questioning.
Lately my answer to “What is Tantra” has become, “Do you want a truth, or do you want it mainstream?”
Some days I feel like Neo from The Matrix asking the other to choose a pill, choose a path.
So this lengthy blog is only if you want it non-mainstream, deep, well-rounded, informative and relatable…kinda like me.
Similarly to asking a doctor, “What is medicine?” The doctor might respond, “Could you be more specific? Medicine for your heart, medicine for your diabetes, your bones, or your brain?”
Thus, when asking “What is Tantra”, it is appropriate to wonder what a person is really asking; “Tantra for your body, Tantra as a philosophy, as a physics, history, origin, Tantra for your life, your mind, your bones, your creativity, entrepreneurial power, overall health and healing, or your bedroom lifestyle?
The point is, saying Tantra IS sex, is like saying medicine IS penicillin, or finance IS money, or engineering IS building.
To recap here is a…
Summery of Tantra Misconceptions
- Tantra is sex
- Tantra is slow sex
- Sensuality is slow
- I can have tantric sex because I already have sex
- BDSM is the opposite of Tantra
- I can make a million dollars in the stock market on my first trade because I know how to balance a checkbook.
From the above, I think you already know where I am going with this.
Not much more (and tons more!) to say, except give you some practical examples that you can integrate into your understanding of Tantra, making you more “Tantric” if you wish.
Tantrics go about all aspects of life differently. Their daily routine and worldview, tend to be different than most. Tantrics go about food, water, decision-making, risk-taking, and sex, differently.
Tantrics have a completely revamped understanding of their bodies, their mind, power, what sexual energy really is, how to recognize it, develop it, harness, control it, use it for spiritually enhancing purposes, and make decisions in life that seem courageous to others.
Now reading that last line, I know that you know people like that; people that live courageously and follow their heart.
I call them “natural Tantrics.”
We will come back to this point.
Instead of saying, “Tantra is Sex” I wish for you to walk away with Tantra is Vibration.
Or if Tantra were sex…it is Vibrational Sex :o)
If you want to sum up Tantra in one word, it would be Resonance (or transformation, or truth…regardless, resonance comes first).
Tantra is not sex, it is Resonance. Thus, it is anything that puts you in VIBRATION.
What are some examples of things that put you in vibration?
For me, it is dance, meditation, writing, sex, reading ancient texts, nature.
I select hobbies that put me in vibration, because that state of being is priceless to me.
It is a space where all my senses absorb, and a focus turns on that does not come from the brain. It comes from somewhere else.
I’ve heard surfers, marathon runners, painters, musicians, actors, all describe something similar. I am sure you have heard something similar too.
Some people call it “being in the flow,” some call it “in the moment,” some call it “tuned-in.”
When do you experience this?
THAT’S ONE TRICK TO BECOMING TANTRIC.
Can you find a way to tap into that experience everyday for 10 minutes?
We all get there differently, but surely none of us get there when we are calculating, analyzing, planning, being busy, trying to be something or somebody.
I know, lots of you reading this are doing just that during lovemaking – calculating, analyzing, planning, etc.
Please don’t do that to yourself.
There is a new muscle to build in your mind and body…and build it until it becomes the default when you are at home and/or with a lover.
Leave that other mind you depend on all day long for work, not for the bedroom. It is there to keep you surviving and safe, not to give you pleasure or peace.
Imagine if your body and mind were already in vibration, “in the flow,” “in the moment”, “in-tune,” “fully present,” AND THEN YOU HAD SEX AND ORGASMED.
Would that that feel different in your body? How?
As you can see, it is a holistically beneficial idea to put some effort toward finding what puts you “in the flow” everyday, if you haven’t done so already.
Like a muscle, that feeling of flow gets stronger, and it can be your modus operandi next time you are in an intimate situation.
All the above thus far about Tantric Sex has to do with you, and your body and your mind. Not your partner.
What Tantrics point out is that when most people are having sex, they are not in-tune with their own body, or present in the moment, they are not in vibration.
Tantrics, want to stay in that moment, extending the minutes and hours of their connection, so they can stay in vibration, and get more and more absorbed into the vibration of the moment.
Before I continue, I want to address the misconception of Tantra being slow sex, or sensuality itself being slow or vice versa…not really.
Tantric sex can range from not physically touching, to hardcore f#%^$@g. As long as both people are in vibration, Tantrics don’t care to define what it looks like externally, i.e., fast, slow, sensual.
Tantra is an inside feeling, and externally it looks like being present in the moment and fully in enjoyment. Sensuality is a feeling, not an external pace of movement.
Vibration is pretty much invisible to most. Things vibrate fast, or slow, and everything in between, like music. So tantric sex, can be fast and/or slow, like music.
A tantric would simply wonder, “Am I vibrating?”
HOW TANTRA WORKS
Back to that point about natural Tantrics.
If one person knows how to put their body in Vibration, that’s great. If one person trusts the other to help put them in vibration, even better. If both know how to be in vibration, even better better… super better.
Similarly to when a tuning fork comes close to another fork, the other will vibrate IF it resonates with it.
Like I said earlier, this is how natural Tantrics are found.
Whether a person is “trained” or “untrained” in Tantra, if your body is ready to Vibrate, you will definitely have a tantric experience when you are with a Tantric.
If you don’t…it is because you weren’t ready or it wasn’t the right time for you.
Similarly to if you are doing your first big trade in the stock market with a pro looking over your shoulder, helping you manage the timings, your mental state and money movement, most likely you’ll score big, and/or at least get a taste of what it feels like to be in the mind and the feeling body of a big-time stockbroker.
To sum up, the more your body is vibrating on the inside, the more fluid, stress-free, healthy and in the flow you life will be…and more pleasurable your sex life.
One way to get there is by find what puts you in vibration, and give it to yourself everyday for 10 minutes. That is what I would do if I were you. It’s smartly paced.
Otherwise, there is Tantra Yoga, also known as “The Lightning Path” – too fast and custom-made for impatient, rebellious, and fearless risk-takers such as myself.
Tantric yogis have developed many meditative methods that will work on just about any body, and can get everyone started down a rabbit hole path.
Many methods are secretly held, and orally passed down, thus, you won’t find them in books or blogs.
Don’t be too fascinated by this secrecy. Why would you want to go down that rabbithole anyways?
Because grass is never green enough where you are, nor on the other side, and like I say on my front page, “There comes a time in every man’s life where he wants more out of intimate encounters.”
I get it.
My hope is that the above helped you gain a more rounded perspective of Tantra…
….and if you are still wondering how Tantrics are known to have some of the best sex around, well that’s equivalent to asking a stockbroker his secrets to making a million dollars (in an hour. LOL!).
He or she will not hand over secrets that easy…
But maybe you’ll feel them.